I just have to post this. I know a lot of you will be able to relate--especially those of you who have spouses that have been in for a while. This isn't the whole article; just pieces of it:

There are a lot of good reasons to spend time with your family, and far fewer good reasons not to. I’ve been in the field on my share of birthdays and holidays, and there’s not much we can do about that.

Still, here’s what I’d change:

I’d leave work every day buy 1800 if at all possible, and earlier if I could. We work form before our children go to school until after they go to bed at night sometimes when they’re small. How many hours might I have spent with them every evening if I’d realized the chance doesn’t come around again?

I once had a boss who talked about the difference between what’s “urgent” and what’s “important”. He hadn’t learned that lesson until late in his career, and didn’t want others to make the same mistakes. He always worked long hours, even once missing his son’s Eagle Scout initiation because of something happening he felt he needed to deal with, but later wished he’d left to someone else.

He had three rules to determine the difference between “important” and “urgent,” and if an event were important he’d offer that you should think long and hard before missing it. To him, an event is important if:
1. It is important to someone who’s important to you;
2. Your personal presence makes a difference; and
3. The opportunity is not going to come around again.

If those 3 conditions are satisfied you have a pretty good idea what you should focus on.

My advice is to make choices wisely. The object for all of us is to make sure we run out of career before we run out of family. 

Amen! Well said. It took my husband 12 years to figure out the Army didn't need you and won't miss you once you are gone. Your family does need you and will miss you when you are gone. Family wins every time.